Tips for Long-Distance Relationships

The month of February usually leads to thoughts of Cupid and his aim when it comes to his arrows of Love. There’s a bit of scramble for cards, candy hearts, and flowers. But what if Cupid has hit his mark—from across the miles (or even an ocean)?

In this day and age, boy-meets-girl, or, better yet, person-meets-person, takes on a whole new avenue. People meet on the street, in the club, the grocery store, in church, yes. But more and more, people are meeting online (internet marriages are not uncommon, either). In some cases, a potential couple has hit it off with an interest in pursuing a relationship, but they live far apart.

Romantic involvements across the miles or the web, are long-distance relationships, and they’ve gained a degree of popularity. However, they’ll still have the problems of ‘normal,’ partners-living-nearby relationships (people are people). But, given the extra challenge of distance, there are some tips to help ease the strain.

Tips for Romancing Long-distance

Begin with discussing each other’s expectations for being in a long-distance relationship. You’d do this for your romantic partner living 5 miles away; same here. Distance doesn’t have to be a barrier here. This shouldn’t be a video conference situation, either. It requires a sacrifice of some time and money for travel, so the two of you can sit down and discuss your expectations. A trip to somewhere ‘neutral’ is ideal, maybe make it a weekend getaway.

However, if travel is off the table right now, video conferencing is a viable option. Technology has made the world a smaller place: Skype and FaceTime are convenient modes of communication putting you ‘right there.’

Whether in-person or on-screen, here are some key topics to go over:

• Discuss any insecurities you face. Trust issues across the miles isn’t unusual.
• With proximity seriously lacking, sexting and phone-sex will be the order of the day—until you meet again. Intimacy is important, so discuss your sexual desires and what you’re comfortable with.
• Discuss ideas for other ways the two of you can help the relationship thrive.

This conversation isn’t a one-time affair. Talk about this stuff regularly as the relationship evolves and your perspectives change. These talks can offer insight and bring you closer—as well as add some spiciness to things (that may lead to some of that phone sex ?).

Maintaining the Good Vibes

Discussion of expectations shouldn’t dominate things, though. There should be periods of simply staying in touch, checking-in, via text, phone, email, video, and social media. But you want to look at each other, sometimes, have some degree of ‘eye contact.’ Establish a set time and frequency (3 days or so) to interact via Skype. Chat and catch up on what’s been going on in your lives. Play games or listen to music together. Get creative.

The key, is ensuring you don’t ‘feel’ the distance separating you. A quality mix of communication, romance, and creativity, using all that technology offers, can only prove beneficial.

Until next time, stay serif.